14/9/2024 Reflection

After talking to many of my friends today, I’ve realised that work remains an ever-present topic, especially for us expats. A friend of mine was venting about the high cost of living in London. She asked me how much I can save per month here, as she’s considering asking for a 20% pay raise. Despite cutting back on social activities and some living expenses, she doesn't want to further lower her quality of life. For two months, she didn’t hang out with us because of financial constraints. It surprised all of us how quickly she goes through her money, even though she doesn’t earn too little. Her rent eats up half of her salary, and she spends the rest on expensive outings like concerts, trips, fine dining, and theatre shows—activities I rarely indulge in. I stick to a budget for social events, which helps me save. Moving in with my boyfriend has also reduced my rent expenses, though I still hope to find a place with better value next year.

London is an interesting place: no matter how much you earn, you can save if you're mindful, or you can spend it all just as easily. I’ve gradually adopted a simpler lifestyle. I still meet friends twice a week but keep my spending low. I’ve learned to skip activities that don’t interest me or are too expensive, whereas two years ago, I’d have gone just to be part of the group. Now, I choose to spend time and money on things that really matter to me.

Another friend, who recently graduated, is feeling anxious about job hunting. She has applied to numerous jobs without hearing back. Job applications here feel like an endless battle—it’s hard, competitive, and frustrating. Most companies don’t even send a rejection notice, which is so different from my previous experience working in Japan. There, companies usually offer feedback or at least one interview round. It makes HR in the UK seem like a high-status job, and sometimes, I wonder if they even look at all the CVs. If I see a position with over 100 applicants, I often don’t bother applying, and even then, replies are rare. But I’ve heard of people finding success after months of perseverance. It’s a process of constant trying until you connect with the right company.

Lastly, I made a big decision today about family. I booked a flight back to China for my mother’s 60th birthday, even though it’s just for four days. Her birthday is such an important milestone, and I spent the morning looking for an expensive gift. The flight was reasonably priced, but I don't have holidays and will spend two days in the air for a short visit. At first, I questioned whether it was worth it, but in the end, I realised that I’d regret missing her birthday. It was a spur-of-the-moment decision, but I feel relieved now. Every time I travel elsewhere instead of going home, I know it saddens my family.

Talking with so many people today made me reflect on my own life. Balancing work and family is always challenging, especially when living in a different country from our loved ones. We need to manage on our own while knowing our family is getting older. It sometimes feels overwhelming, and there may never be a perfect solution. But, as with everyone else, I’m doing my best to make it work.